抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @xuxu940926#00 @xuxu940926 @weqawe#00 @weqawe @%25B3%25C7%25BB%25C4%25C3%25CE%25C9%25A2%25A1%25E5#00 @%25B3%25C7%25BB%25C4%25C3%25CE%25C9%25A2%25A1%25E5 @%25A1%25A6__Summer%25A1%25E3#00 @%25A1%25A6__Summer%25A1%25E3 @%25D2%25C0%25C8%25BB_%25D0%25A1%25B0%25D7#00 @%25D2%25C0%25C8%25BB_%25D0%25A1%25B0%25D7 @%25B3%25C1%25C4%25AC_%25C8%25E2%25CD%25E8#00 @%25B3%25C1%25C4%25AC_%25C8%25E2%25CD%25E8 @%25D0%25A1%25D0%25A1%25D0%25A1%25D0%25A1%25B5%25C4%25C5%25DD%25C4%25AD#00 @%25D0%25A1%25D0%25A1%25D0%25A1%25D0%25A1%25B5%25C4%25C5%25DD%25C4%25AD @%25B2%25D0%25D6%25F2%25BB%25A8#00 @%25B2%25D0%25D6%25F2%25BB%25A8
主持婚礼多少钱
　　婚礼前，新郎问主持人：“主持一场婚礼多少钱？”
　　主持人说：“新娘子越漂亮价格就越贵！”
　　新郎不好意思的给了主持人一块钱。
　　主持人一愣，回头看了一眼新娘，然后又找回了5毛。

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @a5137132#00 @a5137132 @0dwx#00 @0dwx @%25CB%25FD%25BC%25C7%25D2%25E4%25C0%25EF%25D3%25D0%25CE%25D2#00 @%25CB%25FD%25BC%25C7%25D2%25E4%25C0%25EF%25D3%25D0%25CE%25D2 @%25B2%25BB%25CF%25EB%25BB%25EE%25B5%25C4%25B2%25BB%25CF%25F1%25CE%25D2#00 @%25B2%25BB%25CF%25EB%25BB%25EE%25B5%25C4%25B2%25BB%25CF%25F1%25CE%25D2 @%25CF%25C4%25CB%25D5%25C1%25B9%25E8%25D9_#00 @%25CF%25C4%25CB%25D5%25C1%25B9%25E8%25D9_ @%259A%2588%25C7%25C5%25C2%25E4%25BB%25A8#00 @%259A%2588%25C7%25C5%25C2%25E4%25BB%25A8 @%25D5%25E2%25BB%25F5%25B2%25BB%25CA%25C7%25C8%25CB%25CD%25DB#00 @%25D5%25E2%25BB%25F5%25B2%25BB%25CA%25C7%25C8%25CB%25CD%25DB @%25B5%25E3%25C1%25C1__%25B0%25CD%25C0%25E8#00 @%25B5%25E3%25C1%25C1__%25B0%25CD%25C0%25E8
你们一定要懂事
　　一天，幼儿园老师对小朋友说：“你们一定要懂事！”
　　一个小朋友大声地回答：“老师，我还懂五呢！”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25D0%25A1%25B9%25CA%25CA%25C2%25C3%25D4%25C8%25CB#00 @%25D0%25A1%25B9%25CA%25CA%25C2%25C3%25D4%25C8%25CB @CK%25D8%25BCclearly#00 @CK%25D8%25BCclearly @_%25D6%25C7%25B7%25FE%25D3%25D5%25BB%25F3#00 @_%25D6%25C7%25B7%25FE%25D3%25D5%25BB%25F3 @%25B9%25FE%25B9%25FE%25C8%25A518353#00 @%25B9%25FE%25B9%25FE%25C8%25A518353 @%25C9%25D9%25C5%25AE%25B5%25DA%25D2%25BB%25D2%25B9#00 @%25C9%25D9%25C5%25AE%25B5%25DA%25D2%25BB%25D2%25B9 @%25B9%25C2%25C0%25C7%25D6%25AE%25E9%25E4%25C3%25CE#00 @%25B9%25C2%25C0%25C7%25D6%25AE%25E9%25E4%25C3%25CE @AndrewCharlies#00 @AndrewCharlies @%25C0%25CF%25CA%25F3%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25B7%25B2#00 @%25C0%25CF%25CA%25F3%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25B7%25B2
淘气的小兔崽子
　　三岁的儿子拉完便便，我过去给他擦屁股。
　　儿子今天很乖，站到他面前他就把屁股给撅起来。擦完屁股，儿子提上裤子就跑了。
　　我出去时没迈开步子，头一下子撞到墙上。
　　低头一看，这小兔崽子把我脚上两只鞋带给系一块儿了！

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25D0%25A1%25C6%25BF%25D7%25D3%25B5%25C4%25B0%25AE%25C1%25B5#00 @%25D0%25A1%25C6%25BF%25D7%25D3%25B5%25C4%25B0%25AE%25C1%25B5 @%25D1%25B0%25C3%25D9%25D0%25DC%25C3%25A8%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25BA%25A2#00 @%25D1%25B0%25C3%25D9%25D0%25DC%25C3%25A8%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25BA%25A2 @%25D2%25E3%25DC%25B3%25C8%25E7%25B9%25CA#00 @%25D2%25E3%25DC%25B3%25C8%25E7%25B9%25CA @me%25D8%25ADbread#00 @me%25D8%25ADbread @%25CE%25D2%25BB%25B3%25C4%25EE%25B5%25C4S%25CB%25D5%25BE%25B2#00 @%25CE%25D2%25BB%25B3%25C4%25EE%25B5%25C4S%25CB%25D5%25BE%25B2 @%25B2%25D7%25BA%25A3%25D2%25BB%25EB%25FC#00 @%25B2%25D7%25BA%25A3%25D2%25BB%25EB%25FC @952489653#00 @952489653 @Super_VG#00 @Super_VG
你们还有完没完
“老公，我肚子疼。”
“乖，医院到了。”
“老公~”
“我在这。”
“你说这胎是男孩还是女孩？”
“男女都好，是你生的我都喜欢。”
“恩，真好。”
说完，便满足的闭上了眼。
这时，只听见护士怒吼“你们两个大男人有完没完！他是急性阑尾炎开刀，不是破腹产！！！”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @zp__yz#00 @zp__yz @%25D1%25A9%25C2%25E4ing#00 @%25D1%25A9%25C2%25E4ing @%25A9%2581%25C4%25C7%25BD%25F6%25D3%25D0%25B5%25C4%25D6%25B4%25D7%25C5#00 @%25A9%2581%25C4%25C7%25BD%25F6%25D3%25D0%25B5%25C4%25D6%25B4%25D7%25C5 @%25A4%25A4%25BB%25D2%25CD%25AB#00 @%25A4%25A4%25BB%25D2%25CD%25AB @%25D5%25EA%25D0%25A1%25B2%25D9#00 @%25D5%25EA%25D0%25A1%25B2%25D9 @%25CE%25A7%25B6%25C2%25C8%25CB%25D4%25B1#00 @%25CE%25A7%25B6%25C2%25C8%25CB%25D4%25B1 @%25BD%25F0%25CA%25A8%25D7%25D3%25A1%25E4#00 @%25BD%25F0%25CA%25A8%25D7%25D3%25A1%25E4 @%25D7%25C6%25C9%25CB%25CE%25D2%25C4%25DA%25D0%25C4%25B5%25C4%25BB%25B0#00 @%25D7%25C6%25C9%25CB%25CE%25D2%25C4%25DA%25D0%25C4%25B5%25C4%25BB%25B0
祝福老爸的短信
　　本人大学生一枚。
　　刚才突然想起好久未与家里联系，于是编出一条祝福短信发送给老爸。
　　手机马上响了，老爸的，只有三字：“打多少？”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25C0%25B4%25D2%25BB%25D2%25B6%25B2%25CA%25C6%25B1%25B0%25A2#00 @%25C0%25B4%25D2%25BB%25D2%25B6%25B2%25CA%25C6%25B1%25B0%25A2 @baby587521#00 @baby587521 @%25BC%25C5%25C4%25AF%25CA%25B1%25D0%25DD%25BF%25CBx#00 @%25BC%25C5%25C4%25AF%25CA%25B1%25D0%25DD%25BF%25CBx @%25D2%25E3%25D2%25E3%25D2%25E3%25CB%25BF%25B2%25BB%25B9%25D288#00 @%25D2%25E3%25D2%25E3%25D2%25E3%25CB%25BF%25B2%25BB%25B9%25D288 @%25CE%25D1%25B9%25B7%25C8%25A5%25C1%25CB#00 @%25CE%25D1%25B9%25B7%25C8%25A5%25C1%25CB @%25C2%25ED%25D5%25DC%25D0%25A1%25BE%25F4%25D2%25AF#00 @%25C2%25ED%25D5%25DC%25D0%25A1%25BE%25F4%25D2%25AF @%25D2%25BB%25C2%25A5%25BC%25AB%25C6%25B7chu%25C5%25AE#00 @%25D2%25BB%25C2%25A5%25BC%25AB%25C6%25B7chu%25C5%25AE @%25C0%25D6%25CA%25C2%25B7%25AC%25C6%25AC#00 @%25C0%25D6%25CA%25C2%25B7%25AC%25C6%25AC
进门就有礼
　　一家服装店的玻璃窗上贴着这样的广告：不管买不买，进门就有礼。
　　我心想：这店看起来不咋样，想不到这么牛气！
　　我前脚刚一踏进门口，迎宾小姐就鞠了一躬，说道：“欢迎光临，小女子这厢有礼了。”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @MAC%25BF%25CD%25BB%25A7%25B6%25CB#00 @MAC%25BF%25CD%25BB%25A7%25B6%25CB @%25CCK%25C4%25C8%25C4%25C8#00 @%25CCK%25C4%25C8%25C4%25C8 @wzqwangzeqian#00 @wzqwangzeqian @AV%25C5%25AE%25D3%25C5%25D6%25B4%25D0%25D0%25B9%25D9#00 @AV%25C5%25AE%25D3%25C5%25D6%25B4%25D0%25D0%25B9%25D9 @%25B4%25AB%25CB%25B5%25D6%25D0%25B5%25C4%25C9%25A7%25C4%25EA#00 @%25B4%25AB%25CB%25B5%25D6%25D0%25B5%25C4%25C9%25A7%25C4%25EA @%25C6%25A8%25CF%25C9%25EA%25CF%25EA%25CF_#00 @%25C6%25A8%25CF%25C9%25EA%25CF%25EA%25CF_ @%25CE%25D2%25CA%25C7%25B4%25F3%25CA%25A6%25BC%25B6%25C8%25CB%25CE%25EF#00 @%25CE%25D2%25CA%25C7%25B4%25F3%25CA%25A6%25BC%25B6%25C8%25CB%25CE%25EF @%25B6%25E0%25CC%25EC%25BA%25F3#00 @%25B6%25E0%25CC%25EC%25BA%25F3
额外的手术费用
　　手术完毕，病人结账，问道：“怎么还有上网费？”
　　护士：“给你动手术的时候，你肚子里有个东西，我们这里的人都没有见过，临时去百度了一下。”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @___%25CE%25D2%25CA%25C7%25C4%25E3%25D2%25B0%25B5%25F9_#00 @___%25CE%25D2%25CA%25C7%25C4%25E3%25D2%25B0%25B5%25F9_ @414023998#00 @414023998 @asdfghjkl6651#00 @asdfghjkl6651 @remooncake#00 @remooncake @%25C4%25C9%25C0%25BC%25D6%25AE%25CB%25BC#00 @%25C4%25C9%25C0%25BC%25D6%25AE%25CB%25BC @%25C6%25D5%25D7%25D30114#00 @%25C6%25D5%25D7%25D30114 @%2583A%25B3%25C7%25D6%25AE%25D4%25B9#00 @%2583A%25B3%25C7%25D6%25AE%25D4%25B9 @%25B2%25CC%25C2%25DC%25B2%25B7%25B0%25C2%25CC%25D8%25C2%25FC#00 @%25B2%25CC%25C2%25DC%25B2%25B7%25B0%25C2%25CC%25D8%25C2%25FC
只要你高富帅
暮光之城、吸血鬼日记告诉我们：
只要你够高富帅，
那些女孩子根本不在乎你是不是人……

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25DF%25D8%25B3%25EE#00 @%25DF%25D8%25B3%25EE @ww%25B9%25D4%25B9%25D4%25CD%25C3#00 @ww%25B9%25D4%25B9%25D4%25CD%25C3 @%25E0%25CB%25BF%25CD%25D0%25A1%25B1%25A6#00 @%25E0%25CB%25BF%25CD%25D0%25A1%25B1%25A6 @574093597#00 @574093597 @%25A1%25EF%25B5%25DB%25B9%25FA%25A4%25CE%25B4%25F3%25D4%25AA%25CB%25A7#00 @%25A1%25EF%25B5%25DB%25B9%25FA%25A4%25CE%25B4%25F3%25D4%25AA%25CB%25A7 @jbvlrxj#00 @jbvlrxj @%25D6Z%25D6Z%25C1_%2581%2584%25A1%25A4%25CB%25F7%25C2%25A1#00 @%25D6Z%25D6Z%25C1_%2581%2584%25A1%25A4%25CB%25F7%25C2%25A1 @%25CA%25B2%25C3%25B4%25CA%25C7%25D6%25D5%25B5%25E3#00 @%25CA%25B2%25C3%25B4%25CA%25C7%25D6%25D5%25B5%25E3
差别



抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @_jeese#00 @_jeese @qangqanqa#00 @qangqanqa @%25E2%25F9%25BA%25EC%25D4%25BA%25D0%25A1%25CC%25AB%25B1%25A3#00 @%25E2%25F9%25BA%25EC%25D4%25BA%25D0%25A1%25CC%25AB%25B1%25A3 @%25D4%25DA%25D0%25A1%25CA%25F7%25C1%25D6%25B8%25C9%25CA%25B2%25C3%25B4#00 @%25D4%25DA%25D0%25A1%25CA%25F7%25C1%25D6%25B8%25C9%25CA%25B2%25C3%25B4 @2011GDP#00 @2011GDP @%25D7%25AA%25D1%25DB%25D8%25BC%25BB%25A8%25BC%25BE%25C4%25A9%25C2%25E4#00 @%25D7%25AA%25D1%25DB%25D8%25BC%25BB%25A8%25BC%25BE%25C4%25A9%25C2%25E4 @%25B2%25BB%25BF%25C9%25D2%25BB%25CA%25C0%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25D3%25F0#00 @%25B2%25BB%25BF%25C9%25D2%25BB%25CA%25C0%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25D3%25F0 @%25CF%25E3%25D3%25A3%25C5%25A8%25D0%25F5%25E9%25E4%25C4%25AD%25BB%25A8#00 @%25CF%25E3%25D3%25A3%25C5%25A8%25D0%25F5%25E9%25E4%25C4%25AD%25BB%25A8
前后分不清
有时候前后其实不那么分明！



抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25C5%25B7%25B0%25CD%25C9%25A3%25B5%25C4%25B0%25E5%25B5%25CA#00 @%25C5%25B7%25B0%25CD%25C9%25A3%25B5%25C4%25B0%25E5%25B5%25CA @%25DF%25D8%25B3%25EE#00 @%25DF%25D8%25B3%25EE @MAC%25BF%25CD%25BB%25A7%25B6%25CB#00 @MAC%25BF%25CD%25BB%25A7%25B6%25CB @%25B8%25B4%25D6%25C6%25C4%25E3%25B5%25C4%25BD%25BE%25B0%25C1#00 @%25B8%25B4%25D6%25C6%25C4%25E3%25B5%25C4%25BD%25BE%25B0%25C1 @pan_521#00 @pan_521 @%25C1%25F7%25B9%25E2%25C8%25E7%25BB%25D4#00 @%25C1%25F7%25B9%25E2%25C8%25E7%25BB%25D4 @%25D7%25C6%25C9%25CB%25CE%25D2%25C4%25DA%25D0%25C4%25B5%25C4%25BB%25B0#00 @%25D7%25C6%25C9%25CB%25CE%25D2%25C4%25DA%25D0%25C4%25B5%25C4%25BB%25B0 @_____%25CA%25C4%25D1%25D4%25A8r#00 @_____%25CA%25C4%25D1%25D4%25A8r
**青年说笑话
　　昨天跟一女生散步，她说好冷。
　　我就和她说：“你听过这个段子没？一对男女在散步。女生说好冷，普通青年就脱下衣服给她披上；文艺青年就解开自己衣服把她搂怀里；二比青年说：‘你学我，蹦蹦就不冷了。’”
　　她笑了一会，说：“还有个**青年说了个笑话。”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25D0%25A1%25D5%25FE%25B5%25F9#00 @%25D0%25A1%25D5%25FE%25B5%25F9 @%25C8%25D5%25C2%25FE%25B9%25B7%25D4%25FC%25D4%25FC#00 @%25C8%25D5%25C2%25FE%25B9%25B7%25D4%25FC%25D4%25FC @%25C1%25FA%25D6%25E9ZEQ2#00 @%25C1%25FA%25D6%25E9ZEQ2 @%25B2%25D0_%25B0%25AE%25B2%25BB%25C4%25DCshare#00 @%25B2%25D0_%25B0%25AE%25B2%25BB%25C4%25DCshare @%25C4%25E3%25C3%25C3%25C1%25B3%25C9%25AB%25B2%25BB%25CC%25AB%25BA%25C3#00 @%25C4%25E3%25C3%25C3%25C1%25B3%25C9%25AB%25B2%25BB%25CC%25AB%25BA%25C3 @kaxintangwawa#00 @kaxintangwawa @%25B6%25DFa%25B6%25E0b#00 @%25B6%25DFa%25B6%25E0b @%25BB%25B9%25CD%25A8%25B9%25FD%25BC%25D3%25B4%25F3#00 @%25BB%25B9%25CD%25A8%25B9%25FD%25BC%25D3%25B4%25F3
占座
对付那些占座的，就是要这样！表情亮喷了……



抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @gongyue224108#00 @gongyue224108 @%25D0%25A1%25BB%25AA%25D2%25AF#00 @%25D0%25A1%25BB%25AA%25D2%25AF @qqqqwsz#00 @qqqqwsz @%25D8%25BCCruea%25A1%25A4#00 @%25D8%25BCCruea%25A1%25A4 @%25B6%25AB%25B3%25C7%25C4%25D0%25BA%25A2888#00 @%25B6%25AB%25B3%25C7%25C4%25D0%25BA%25A2888 @%25D0%25A6%25BF%25B4%25A8t%25B3%25BE%25CA%25C0%25C3%25C0#00 @%25D0%25A6%25BF%25B4%25A8t%25B3%25BE%25CA%25C0%25C3%25C0 @%25D2%25B9%25D1%25EB%25B9%25AC%25D0%25D0#00 @%25D2%25B9%25D1%25EB%25B9%25AC%25D0%25D0 @%25B9%25CA%25B6%25F8%25CA%25C7%25CB%25FB#00 @%25B9%25CA%25B6%25F8%25CA%25C7%25CB%25FB
看守油锅的小鬼
　　这天，马面急匆匆地跑来向阎王禀报：“大人，你刚才安排看守油锅的小鬼是个变态。”
　　阎王大吃一惊，问：“怎么回事？”
　　马面说：“以前的小鬼推人下油锅，都是一个一个推下去。这个小鬼却是把人扭在一起，两个两个扔进去的。”
　　阎王松了一口气，说：“这有啥呀？！忘了告诉你，那个小鬼生前是个炸麻花的。”

抱歉，召唤各位，老衲只是给吧里拉拉人气。欢迎各位常驻此吧 @%B8%D6%CC%FA%C8%CB1%BA%C5 @%B4%F2%B5%C4%D6%BB%CA%C7%BD%B4%D3%CD @standyboy @530789565 @%A1%F4%A1%F3%D8%AF%D0%A1%C0%E1 @lwx707x @%C2%B7%D2%D7%C9%AFand%D4%FA%C0%AD @%B6%E9%C2%E4%B5%C4%CC%AB%C3%C0
孩子是谁的
　　在地铁上听到一个男人跟旁边的女性朋友炫耀说：“10年之后，至少我能知道我的孩子姓什么。你就杯具了，还是未知数呢！”
　　那女同学回句：“但是我的孩子肯定是我的孩子，你的孩子就未必了。”

抱歉，召唤各位，老衲只是给吧里拉拉人气。欢迎各位常驻此吧 @%B1%AF%B7%E7%B4%CA%C8%CB @Hl%D0%A1%E8%AA @Mr__Cecil @%92%98%C4%E3%C3%C3%D6%BD%B5%C4 @%B0%C5%C0%D9%D6%AE%C9%CF%B7%C9%D1%EF @Three%D8%BC3 @%F7%CE%F4m%DC%B3%F7%CD%F7%CB @%B4%F2%CB%C0%CC%FA%BD%B3
他们不能分手
　　和一姐妹逛街，讨论起前男友。
　　姐妹说：“也不知道他现在怎么样了？跟那女人分了没有？”
　　姐看向远方，淡然地说：“我怎么可能忍心看他们分手呢？我要看着他们结婚，吵架，冷战，小三，家庭暴力，不孕不育……”