抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @KB24Lonely%25BD%25F0%25C1%25DB#00 @KB24Lonely%25BD%25F0%25C1%25DB @%25B9%25D4%25B1%25BF%25B1%25BF%25DF%25D5#00 @%25B9%25D4%25B1%25BF%25B1%25BF%25DF%25D5 @%25CF%25B2%25BB%25B6%25B1%25CC%25B2%25A8%25B5%25B4%25D1%25FA#00 @%25CF%25B2%25BB%25B6%25B1%25CC%25B2%25A8%25B5%25B4%25D1%25FA @%25D6%25D0%25D3%25A2%25C3%25C0%25D1%25AA%25CD%25B3#00 @%25D6%25D0%25D3%25A2%25C3%25C0%25D1%25AA%25CD%25B3 @1984_mu#00 @1984_mu @%25A4%25C5H#00 @%25A4%25C5H @%25C0%25E4%25D2%25B9%25A1%25A4%25CE%25DE%25C9%25F9#00 @%25C0%25E4%25D2%25B9%25A1%25A4%25CE%25DE%25C9%25F9 @Danielshi#00 @Danielshi
口蹄疫
这两天舌头下面长了一溜口腔溃疡，脚上长了几个湿疹，天天冲我妈撒娇：55555…妈妈～嘴疼～脚痒～
我妈终于受不了我天天嘟囔了，很严肃的问我：你是不是得口蹄疫了？

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @C1a1re#00 @C1a1re @%25C4%25AA%25CE%25CA_%25C1%25F7%25C4%25EA%25CB%25C6%25CB%25AE#00 @%25C4%25AA%25CE%25CA_%25C1%25F7%25C4%25EA%25CB%25C6%25CB%25AE @%25D0%25A1%25B7%25C9%25D8%25BCgg#00 @%25D0%25A1%25B7%25C9%25D8%25BCgg @%25D2%25FE%25D5%25DF_%25B7%25B9#00 @%25D2%25FE%25D5%25DF_%25B7%25B9 @wnassen#00 @wnassen @%25BB%25FA%25B7%25E6%25D3%25CE%25BF%25CD#00 @%25BB%25FA%25B7%25E6%25D3%25CE%25BF%25CD @blox_#00 @blox_ @xqzzm034#00 @xqzzm034
不得不做的事情
　　丈夫打电话来，说今晚有应酬，不能回家吃饭了。
　　儿子问：“妈妈，什么是应酬？”
　　我向儿子解释：“不想去，但是又不得不去，就叫作应酬。”
　　儿子恍然大悟。第二天早上他要上学了，向我说：“妈妈，我要去应酬了。”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @s503296539#00 @s503296539 @5526914#00 @5526914 @%25B2%25CA%25C9%25AB%25BB%25C8#00 @%25B2%25CA%25C9%25AB%25BB%25C8 @%25B1%25DF%25CB%25A2%25B1%25DF%25B3%25D4%25B6%25B9%25B6%25B9#00 @%25B1%25DF%25CB%25A2%25B1%25DF%25B3%25D4%25B6%25B9%25B6%25B9 @%25CD%25F8%25C3%25FB%25D3%25D0%25C4%25F1%25D3%25C3#00 @%25CD%25F8%25C3%25FB%25D3%25D0%25C4%25F1%25D3%25C3 @%25B8%25F8%25B4%25BA%25B8%25E7%25B5%25C4%25B0%25AE#00 @%25B8%25F8%25B4%25BA%25B8%25E7%25B5%25C4%25B0%25AE @AKB4%25B0%25CB#00 @AKB4%25B0%25CB @%25BA%25A3%25BE%25FC%25B5%25DA%25B6%25FE%25CA%25AE%25C6%25DF%25CA%25A6#00 @%25BA%25A3%25BE%25FC%25B5%25DA%25B6%25FE%25CA%25AE%25C6%25DF%25CA%25A6
最干净的人
　　妹妹：哥，你是我见过最爱干净的人。
　　小新：过奖了，你是怎么看出来的？
　　妹妹：不管什么事，你都推得一干二净。

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25D0%25A6%25D6%25F8%25D5fBaybay%25A5%25E1#00 @%25D0%25A6%25D6%25F8%25D5fBaybay%25A5%25E1 @%25D2%25BB%25CA%25C0%25CF%25B7%25D7%25D3%25D8%25BC#00 @%25D2%25BB%25CA%25C0%25CF%25B7%25D7%25D3%25D8%25BC @%25A1%25B8Hatsune%25A1%25B9%25A9a#00 @%25A1%25B8Hatsune%25A1%25B9%25A9a @%25B2%25BB%25D4%25B8%25B8%25BA%25C7%25E4#00 @%25B2%25BB%25D4%25B8%25B8%25BA%25C7%25E4 @c88311819#00 @c88311819 @%25C7m%25CF%25B5%25BA%25C3%25C9%25D9%25C4%25EA#00 @%25C7m%25CF%25B5%25BA%25C3%25C9%25D9%25C4%25EA @w675131412#00 @w675131412 @%25BA%25C6%25BA%25C6%25D7%25BD%25C3%25D4%25B2%25D8#00 @%25BA%25C6%25BA%25C6%25D7%25BD%25C3%25D4%25B2%25D8
主持费
婚礼前，新郎问主持人：“主持一场婚礼多少钱？”
主持人说：“新娘子越漂亮价格就越贵！”
新郎不好意思的给了主持人一块钱。
主持人一愣，回头看了一眼新娘，然后又找回了5毛。

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25BF%25C9%25B6%25F9ever%25B7%25E3#00 @%25BF%25C9%25B6%25F9ever%25B7%25E3 @%25C5%25B7%25D1%25F4%25B0%25D4%25CA%25C0#00 @%25C5%25B7%25D1%25F4%25B0%25D4%25CA%25C0 @13515876220#00 @13515876220 @%25D5hjust%25D2%25BC#00 @%25D5hjust%25D2%25BC @%25C2%25F4%25D1%25CE%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25B9%25C3%25C4%25EF#00 @%25C2%25F4%25D1%25CE%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A1%25B9%25C3%25C4%25EF @406%25C4%25CF%25B8%25E7#00 @406%25C4%25CF%25B8%25E7 @%25CF%25FC%25D2%25B9%25B2%25BB%25BF%25F1#00 @%25CF%25FC%25D2%25B9%25B2%25BB%25BF%25F1 @m7021599#00 @m7021599
你爸爸叫什么
　　路边有一小孩在哭，有一个好心的过路人在帮助他。
　　过路人：“你怎么自己一个人在这儿？”
　　孩子：“爸爸和妈妈打架，我出来了，找不到回家的路了。”
　　过路人：“那你知道你爸爸叫什么吗？”
　　孩子哭得更加厉害了：“我不知道，爸爸也是因为这个在跟妈妈打架。”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25D0%25A1%25BF%25FB%25CF%25A3%25CD%25FB%25D0%25D2%25B8%25A3#00 @%25D0%25A1%25BF%25FB%25CF%25A3%25CD%25FB%25D0%25D2%25B8%25A3 @%25C9%25A7%25D1%25B7%25B7%25E7%25C9%25A7%25B5%25C4%25B2%25CB%25B2%25CB#00 @%25C9%25A7%25D1%25B7%25B7%25E7%25C9%25A7%25B5%25C4%25B2%25CB%25B2%25CB @Scotland%25B7%25E8%25B5%25CF#00 @Scotland%25B7%25E8%25B5%25CF @%25C0%25C1%25D0%25A3%25B3%25A4#00 @%25C0%25C1%25D0%25A3%25B3%25A4 @%25C3%25C8%25EC%25E1%25C5%25A3%25B8%25E7#00 @%25C3%25C8%25EC%25E1%25C5%25A3%25B8%25E7 @%25C6%25AD%25D7%25D3%25B8%25FA%25C4%25D0%25C8%25CB#00 @%25C6%25AD%25D7%25D3%25B8%25FA%25C4%25D0%25C8%25CB @%25CE%25D2%25CA%25C7JIGSAW#00 @%25CE%25D2%25CA%25C7JIGSAW @%25D9%25E2%25D8%25BC%25D8%25BC%25C4%25B3%25C4%25B3#00 @%25D9%25E2%25D8%25BC%25D8%25BC%25C4%25B3%25C4%25B3
少抽烟少喝酒
　　患者到医院看病，医生说：“你以后少抽点烟，少喝点酒。”
　　患者照做了，可是复查的时侯病却更重了。
　　医生说：“那你以后别抽烟，也别喝酒了。”
　　患者说：“我以前就不抽烟，也不喝酒呀！”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25B3%25C2%25D0%25A1%25C5%25D6%25B2%25BB%25B3%25AA%25B8%25E8#00 @%25B3%25C2%25D0%25A1%25C5%25D6%25B2%25BB%25B3%25AA%25B8%25E8 @%25B9%25B7%25D1%25DB%25B7%25C5%25C2%25CC%25B9%25E2#00 @%25B9%25B7%25D1%25DB%25B7%25C5%25C2%25CC%25B9%25E2 @ANNIE%25D4%25F3%25D4%25F3#00 @ANNIE%25D4%25F3%25D4%25F3 @%25D0%25A1%25EA%25D8%25D1%25F401#00 @%25D0%25A1%25EA%25D8%25D1%25F401 @_%25C2%25DC%25B2%25B7%25B2%25B7%25CD%25C3%25D7%25D3%25BE%25FD#00 @_%25C2%25DC%25B2%25B7%25B2%25B7%25CD%25C3%25D7%25D3%25BE%25FD @%25D6%25D3%25B0%25AE%25EA%2590Eason#00 @%25D6%25D3%25B0%25AE%25EA%2590Eason @%25B9%25FE%25DF%25E4%25CD%25F5%25D7%25D3#00 @%25B9%25FE%25DF%25E4%25CD%25F5%25D7%25D3 @%25BF%25A8%25BF%25A80607#00 @%25BF%25A8%25BF%25A80607
忍者神龟么？
每个悲催的宠物背后，都有个二逼的主人！



抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25D0%25BB%25D0%25BB%25C6%25C5%25C6%25C5%25C5%25B6#00 @%25D0%25BB%25D0%25BB%25C6%25C5%25C6%25C5%25C5%25B6 @erikdavid#00 @erikdavid @%25CF%25F4%25CF%25F4%25D9%25E2mr#00 @%25CF%25F4%25CF%25F4%25D9%25E2mr @%25BB%25F0%25BB%25FA%25C9%25D5%25BF%25AA%25CB%25AE#00 @%25BB%25F0%25BB%25FA%25C9%25D5%25BF%25AA%25CB%25AE @longfanhang123#00 @longfanhang123 @%25E8%25EE%25E6%25F1%25B2%25BB%25D1%25B1%25B5%25C4%25C7%25B9%25C9%25F1#00 @%25E8%25EE%25E6%25F1%25B2%25BB%25D1%25B1%25B5%25C4%25C7%25B9%25C9%25F1 @%25BE%25C9%25CA%25B6shy#00 @%25BE%25C9%25CA%25B6shy @%25C4%25E3%25C4%25A4%25B0%25DD%25CE%25D2%25C1%25CB%25C2%25F0#00 @%25C4%25E3%25C4%25A4%25B0%25DD%25CE%25D2%25C1%25CB%25C2%25F0
游戏机太好了
　　儿子对舅舅说：“您送我的游戏机真是太好了。”
　　舅舅听了很高兴：“是吗？”
　　“嗯，妈妈说只要我不玩，她就给我发奖励。”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%258F%258A%25DF%25A3%25BB%25D2%25B7%25C9%25E4%25CE%25C3%25F0#00 @%258F%258A%25DF%25A3%25BB%25D2%25B7%25C9%25E4%25CE%25C3%25F0 @%25B0%25AE%25C2%25ED%25CA%25CB%25D5%25AC#00 @%25B0%25AE%25C2%25ED%25CA%25CB%25D5%25AC @oh%25B7%25E3zZ#00 @oh%25B7%25E3zZ @%25D7%25B7%25C7%25F3%25D0%25D2%25B8%25A3%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A6%25D1%25D5#00 @%25D7%25B7%25C7%25F3%25D0%25D2%25B8%25A3%25B5%25C4%25D0%25A6%25D1%25D5 @%25BA%25EF%25B4%25F3%25B0%25F4%25E9%25B3#00 @%25BA%25EF%25B4%25F3%25B0%25F4%25E9%25B3 @Greed___#00 @Greed___ @%25CA%25A6%25CC%25AB%25C4%25E3%25BA%25C3%25CC%25D6%25D1%25E1%25B0%25A2#00 @%25CA%25A6%25CC%25AB%25C4%25E3%25BA%25C3%25CC%25D6%25D1%25E1%25B0%25A2 @%25CF%25E3%25CB%25AE%25CE%25B6%25CC%25AB%25C9%25A7#00 @%25CF%25E3%25CB%25AE%25CE%25B6%25CC%25AB%25C9%25A7
帅气的我
LZ归来，上照片啦~我是不是很帅呢？



抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @YaphetS%25D8%25AD%25B7%25E5#00 @YaphetS%25D8%25AD%25B7%25E5 @%25BF%25D5%25B3%25C7%25D2%25EBMM#00 @%25BF%25D5%25B3%25C7%25D2%25EBMM @%25CA%25B2%25C3%25B4%25CA%25C7%25D6%25D5%25B5%25E3#00 @%25CA%25B2%25C3%25B4%25CA%25C7%25D6%25D5%25B5%25E3 @%25B8%25F1%25B5%25F7%25CA%25BD%25B2%25F8%25C3%25E0#00 @%25B8%25F1%25B5%25F7%25CA%25BD%25B2%25F8%25C3%25E0 @%25BE%25F8%25CC%25E5%25BE%25F8%25C3%25FC%25D5%25AC%25C4%25D0#00 @%25BE%25F8%25CC%25E5%25BE%25F8%25C3%25FC%25D5%25AC%25C4%25D0 @AndrewCharlies#00 @AndrewCharlies @toivsvn30187#00 @toivsvn30187 @%25BF%25C9%25B0%25AE%25B5%25C4%25B9%25F0%25BB%25A8#00 @%25BF%25C9%25B0%25AE%25B5%25C4%25B9%25F0%25BB%25A8
考官永远是对的
一位先生去考驾照。
口试时，主考官问：
“当你看到一只狗和一个人在车前时，你是轧狗还是轧人？”
那位先生不假思索地回答：“当然是轧狗了。”
主考官摇摇头说：“你下次再来考试吧。”
那位先生很不服气：“我不轧狗，难道轧人吗？”
主考官大声训斥道：“你应该刹车。”

抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @463406687#00 @463406687 @%258C%25AD%25C4%25E0%25C3%25BA#00 @%258C%25AD%25C4%25E0%25C3%25BA @%25CE%25D4%25B2%25DB_Goingdown#00 @%25CE%25D4%25B2%25DB_Goingdown @%25D0%25D2%25B8%25A3%25B5%25C4%25BF%25DA%25CB%25AE%25D6%25ED#00 @%25D0%25D2%25B8%25A3%25B5%25C4%25BF%25DA%25CB%25AE%25D6%25ED @%25F3%25E3%25C7%25F0%25B1%25C8#00 @%25F3%25E3%25C7%25F0%25B1%25C8 @BeyondAvril#00 @BeyondAvril @%25D5%25F0%25C4%25E3%25D2%25BB%25CF%25C2%25C7%25C9%25BF%25CB%25D3%25B2#00 @%25D5%25F0%25C4%25E3%25D2%25BB%25CF%25C2%25C7%25C9%25BF%25CB%25D3%25B2 @%25B0%25AE%25CC%25AB%25B2%25BB%25B6%25AE#00 @%25B0%25AE%25CC%25AB%25B2%25BB%25B6%25AE
揭秘妹子的卧室
妹子们的床原来是这样的！



抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @______%25B6%25CC%25B7%25A2%25CF%25C4%25CC%25EC#00 @______%25B6%25CC%25B7%25A2%25CF%25C4%25CC%25EC @%25C1%25FA%25D5%25BD%25C6%25F8%25CA%25C6#00 @%25C1%25FA%25D5%25BD%25C6%25F8%25CA%25C6 @%25C5%25E3%25C4%25E3%25D6%25B1%25B5%25BD%25CC%25EC%25C1%25C1_#00 @%25C5%25E3%25C4%25E3%25D6%25B1%25B5%25BD%25CC%25EC%25C1%25C1_ @a455288136#00 @a455288136 @%25B2%25BB%25B9%25FD%25C8%25E7%25B4%25CB%25B5%25C4%25B7%25E7%25C9%25A7#00 @%25B2%25BB%25B9%25FD%25C8%25E7%25B4%25CB%25B5%25C4%25B7%25E7%25C9%25A7 @xtxiaopan#00 @xtxiaopan @%258A%255B%25B0%25A1#00 @%258A%255B%25B0%25A1 @zp__yz#00 @zp__yz
企鹅也怕冷
最冷的时候，什么都是有用的！



抱歉，召唤大家，大家关注此吧吧 @%25C4%25E3%25CF%25F1%25CE%25C2%25C8%25E1%25D2%25B0%25CA%25DE#00 @%25C4%25E3%25CF%25F1%25CE%25C2%25C8%25E1%25D2%25B0%25CA%25DE @gzdqakro#00 @gzdqakro @%25D6%25BB%25CD%25B5%25B7%25BD%25CF%25F2%25C5%25CC#00 @%25D6%25BB%25CD%25B5%25B7%25BD%25CF%25F2%25C5%25CC @___%25B0%25AE%25B2%25BB%25B0%25AE%25CE%25D2%25D8%25BC#00 @___%25B0%25AE%25B2%25BB%25B0%25AE%25CE%25D2%25D8%25BC @1140607386#00 @1140607386 @mintchu86#00 @mintchu86 @nixilin#00 @nixilin @%25D0%25DE%25C2%25DE%25D0%25A1L#00 @%25D0%25DE%25C2%25DE%25D0%25A1L
温柔爱护植物人
　　昨晚和女友看赌神，小七被摔成植物人了，赌神各种温柔。
　　女友激动地问我：“要是我变成植物人了，你会不会这样对我啊？”
　　我低调地说：“如果你变成植物人了，就用你打僵尸啊！”